What the Eyes Can't See
by Spamanoforever
Summary: Lovino Vargas is a moody Italian with a traumatic past. Antonio Fernandez Carriedo is an airheaded Spaniard who only wants to help. Fiery meets cheerful when the two meet, and their fates are set into stone - but will they be able to overcome the biggest challenge of all in their relationship? Or will Lovino's past tear them apart forever? T for language/violence/self-harm. Spamano


_Left_

_Right_

_Left_

_Right_

"Lovi, are you okay?" Feliciano's voice rang out in the crisp morning air, like a wind-chime tinkling in an autumn breeze.

Except more annoying.

"I'mfine, _bastardo,_" I grumbled in answer, scowl deepening.

"Ve~, okay then _fratello_." The younger replied, unperturbed by my attitude and harsh words. Yeah...After years of living with me, Feli was used to it.

Silence had blanketed us again, and I dimly noticed that my thoughts had fallen back into their march-like routine, directing my footsteps like some kind of chant.

_Left_

_Right_

_Left_

_Ri-_

"Ve, _fratello_?" Came my airheaded _fratellino's_ light voice again, innocently inquiring.

I sighed, a bit overdram- with _reason_ dammit!- and turned my head to face the source of my younger twin brother's voice. "Yes, Feli?" I replied, fighting to stay calm. I just wished I could go back to sleep... I had been fucking _loathing_ today for a long time. I mean, is it really so fucking important to go to damn sch-

"Are you going to make any new friends this year, ve~?"

Ugh. _Straight to the point in the worse of times, eh Feli?_ The question felt like a blow to my - non girly and slender, _manly, _dammit! - gut. School. Hell with a fucking name. And today, lo and behold, was the first day back! Woop-de-fucking-doo. With all the shitty school work and the bitchy teachers and _ugh-it-pissed-me-off-so-FUCKING-MUCH! _Every year I had to witness my airheaded twin make a fuckton of friends, while I was avoided _LIKETHEFUCKINGPLAGUE. _You may be thinking, '_But why are you hated Lovino? You're so lovable~!'... _Wait no. If you're thinking that, you need some serious fucking help. Back on track, I'm avoided and friendless because I am a seriously messed up little fucker.

And no, I am _**not**_ exaggerating, so you can go fuck yourself.

Why in hell am I so fucking messed in the brain? Well _it all started_ when fate decided to fuck with me by killing off my father with some kind of cancer. I don't fucking know what kind, I was only like 4 or something. So anyway over the years, my batshit insane mother freaking lost it and tried to kill herself. Shoved a fucking gun up her mouth. But _no_, Fate couldn't just take her and be done with it! No instead Fate decided to put the cherry on top of this fuckwad of a mess and thought '_Huh? You know what would make this even better? If this batshit crazy lady suddenly noticed her son hiding and thought to take him with her! Yeah, that sounds fucking amazing!'_

My mother shot me in the fucking eyes._ My. Own. Mother._ _Tried. To. Kill. Me._ She must have thought it worked with all the fucking sounds I was making and shoved the barrel of the handgun and pulled the trigger. At least I didn't see her brain splatter the ceiling, thanks to her aim. I sure as hell fucking heard it though.

So, because of that _incident_, not only do I have to live with my weird-ass grandpa, Romulus, now, but I'm also seriously fucked up in the head.

Most people catch on to my _'approach-me-and-I'll-fuck-you-up'_ scowl and stay far away, and even if they do attempt to converse with me, they usually back the fuck off in a few days - or minutes - because I'm too-fucking-much to handle. It's not like I blame the bastards - I hate myself too. The only reason I'm still alive is because of my brother. I have this weird ass thing going on in my head that I have to protect him at all costs - can't let and perverted fuckers contaminate my _fratellino_, after all. The question on your mind is probably '_Have you even _tried_ to kill yourself?'_

My answer is fuck yes I have. Cutting, pills, jumping, guns... you name it, I've tried it. I always stop at the last moment, though. I can't bring myself to do it. I'm a fucking coward. Don't get me wrong, I still cut... Scars lace my skin like stars in the sky. That was a perfectly _manly_ simile, not sappy-girly-shit, so you just fucking _shut it_.

I kept on scowling, albeit a bit more venomous now, until annoying incarnate spoke up again, interrupting my twisted musings.

"Ve~, Lovi? Did you space out again?"

I flinched - shut the fuck up, you would too with the thoughts I was having! "E-eh? Ah. Friends, right... Yeah, Feli. I'm sure I will," I lied.

I heard my _fratello's_ steps lighten slightly, which told me that he believed me and is assured by my blatant lie.

Distracted by my musings, I apparently failed to notice the niche in the sidewalk, and gravity decided to screw me over. I would have fallen on my face and probably gotten blood all over the asphalt that someone probably worked _oh-so-hard_ to keep clean if not for my savior coming in the form of a wall of something warm and firm. And by warm, I mean fucking _warm_. Like left-out-in-the-sun-to-roast-until-it-was-a-puddle-of-goo warm. Jesus-fucking-_Christ_!What the fucking hell _is_ that?!

Whatever the _fuck _it was, I was seriously gratefu- I mean, _pissed-as-hell!_ Couldn't it see my face and the sidewalk had something going on? Way to be a fucking cockblock, wall-of-warm-as-hell-whatever-the-hell-it-is. A heavily accented voice interrupted my internal ranting, "Hey there _amigo, _you okay there?"

I growled and pushed him- the voice was obviously male- away, brushing of my pants and righting myself with an I'm-pissed-at-you-and-what-the-fuck-are-you-gonna-do-about-it scowl. "Of course I'm fucking okay, _bastardo._"

"Okay, okay! Ahaa~ you're funny _amigo_! And you're cheeks are all red and puffed out! Oh wow! You look _just_ like a tomato! So cute!"

The cooing - yeah. Fucking _cooing_. Messed up motherfucker, he was... - of the apparent Spaniard just caused my face to redden even further. "_Vaffanculo!_" I yelled, trembling with embarra - _anger!_ - getting ready to run off and flip him the bird.

"Ahaha~! _Lo siento_, you just looked so cute~! Anyway, _mi pico de tomate_, you must have been either really _really_ oblivious or blind to have not seen that niche," he joked.

That shut me up. Pressing my lips into a firm line while deepening my scowl, I swiftly walked around the teen. I left Feliciano to catch up on his own, not stopping or slowing down until I had gotten to school.

My cheeks had reddened. I fucking _hated it_ when they did that. I continued on my way, not needing any guidance, I knew the path so well, and proceeded to space out the entire school day. Or, you know, I would have if I hadn't been interrupted.

"Lovino Vargas! Eyes up here!"

My signature scowl settled itself on my face as I turned my head in the direction of the voice of my teacher.

"Lovino, look me in the _eyes!_" She hollered, loosing patience.

I gritted my teeth and forced myself to calm down before I _fuckingshowedherwhatfor. She's just an idiot teacher, Lovino._ _It's not her fault she deserves a fork up her ass._ Successfully simmering down, I answered, "I can't."

God-fucking-damnit I could _feel_ her disapproving glare. "And why _not? _Tell us, Mr. Vargas, why _can't_ you look me in the eye?"

_She thinks I'm guilty of something._ I bared my teeth for a few seconds before once again calmly taking a deep breath.

"Because I'm blind."


End file.
